Posts Tagged ‘Simon Morden’

March Events

Friday, March 15: Gail Z. Martin @ Lunacon, Rye Brook, NY

March 20-21: Marlene Perez @ Kennesaw State University Conference on Literature for Children and Young Adults, Kennesaw, GA

March 21-24: N.K. Jemisin and Mira Grant @ Vericon, Cambridge, MA

March 22-24: Gail Z. Martin @ Arizona Renaissance Festival, Gold Canyon, AZ

Thursday, March 28: Francis Knight at Fantasy in the Court, Goldsboro Books, London, 6 PM

Thursday, March 28: Amanda Downum @ Dragon’s Lair Comics, Austin, TX, 7 PM

March 29-30: Jaye Wells @ Dreamin’ in Dallas, Richardson, TX

March 29 – April 1: Eastercon, Bradford. Walter Jon Williams is a Guest of Honor; also attending will be Michael Cobley, Francis Knight, and Simon Morden.

March 29 – April 1: Swancon, Perth. Charles Stross is the International Guest; also attending will be Glenda Larke.

The Samuil Petrovitch Guide to (Violent) Russian Swearing

The Curve of the Earth, a new Samuil Petrovitch near-future science fiction novel from Philip K. Dick award-winner Simon Morden - perfect for fans of Richard MorganSuper-genius cyborg and hero of the Freezone, Samuil Petrovitch, has a fiery temper – one prone to exploding with more potency than the nukes that signaled the apocalypse around the turn of the 21st century. Generally, Petrovitch’s explosions of anger will take the form of curses in his Russian mother tongue (or perhaps explosions of extreme violence, poisoning, putting bombs in people’s chests and stitching them up again… He’s nothing if not inventive).

To help you decode the various insults hurled at all and sundry by Petrovitch in Simon Morden’s new novel  THE CURVE OF THE EARTH (UK | US | ANZ), we’ve put together a handy glossary of Russian swearwords with a very British translation so as not to offend any delicate sensibilities…

Ahueyet
Samuil Petrovitch usage: Ahueyet! We’ve got some series govno on our hands.
Translation: Egad! It appears our metacarpus have become tainted with effluent.

Balvan
Samuil Petrovitch usage: The only way I can explain your actions is to assume your father was balvan.
Translation: Your poor decision making suggest there was an extreme deficiency in your father’s intelligence quotient.

Chyort voz’mi!
Samuil Petrovitch usage: Chyort voz’mi, this is exactly what I didn’t want to happen.
Translation: Curses! I find myself in the most hateful of all possible worlds.

Chyort!
Samuil Petrovitch usage: Chyort! How stupid are you?
Translation: Dash it all! Your foolishness demands explanation!

Durak
Samuil Petrovitch usage: That’s the sort of thing I’d expect to hear from a durak.
Translation: Your communication suggests that your skull is a vacant receptacle rather than a protective covering.

Govno
Samuil Petrovitch usage: I have had enough of this govno.
Translation: No more faeces for me, thank you.

Idi v’zhopu
Samuil Petrovitch usage: Seriously, Reconstructionist America can idi v’zhopu
Translation: I would recommend that Reconstructionist America remove itself from my presence at once, preferably in a painful manner.

Kalash
Samuil Petrovitch usage: Glad I brought my Kalash.
Translation: How fortuitous that I have this Russian-made firearm

Kon govno
Samuil Petrovitch usage: I’ve had enough of your kon govno.
Translation: I doubt the veracity of your explanation, which has the perfume of equestrian faeces.

Past’ zabej
Samuil Petrovitch usage: Past’ zajeb, or I’ll blow your knees off
Translation: Be quiet, my good sir, or I shall be forced to relieve you of your mobility.

Pizdets
Samuil Petrovitch usage: This a whole new category of  pizdets
Translation: Our situation is  beginning to resemble a cluster of effluent.

Pushka
Samuil Petrovitch usage: If I had a decent pushka, this wouldn’t be such pizdets
Translation: How I yearn for a firearm of significant calibre to relieve the difficulty of my situation!

Yajtza
Samuil Petrovitch usage: Your yajtza must be bigger than the moon.
Translation: Your gentleman’s treasures appear to be of planetary proportion.

Yebani
Samuil Petrovitch usage: Get this yebani tube out of my gullet before I vomit into my lungs.
Translation: Kindly remove this fornicating tube from my digestive tract or I fear we will be having a backwards performance of breakfast.

Yobany stos
Samuil Petrovitch usage: Yobany stos, is that the only gun you brought?
Translation: Ploppers! I had expected you to be more fully prepared for armed combat.

Zhopa
Samuil Petrovitch usage: You talk too much, zhopa.
Translation: You are surprisingly communicative for an orifice that is not generally used for speaking.

>> Read the first chapter of Simon Morden’s The Curve of the Earth

Announcing THE PETROVITCH TRILOGY, now an eBook Omnibus!

Philip K. Dick award winning The Samuil Petrovitch Trilogy by Simon MordenThe Philip K. Dick award-winning series, THE PETROVITCH TRILOGY (UK | US) by Simon Morden is about to be released as an ebook omnibus for the first time.

This is ahead of the release of  brand new title from Simon called THE CURVE OF THE EARTH (UK | US | ANZ) – also coming in March.

All these novels star Russian émigré and super-genius Samuil Petrovitch, whose incredibly low tolerance for fools and penchant for getting on the wrong side of pretty much everyone makes him the most unlikely hero the world has ever seen.

Or what’s left of the world, anyway.

See, there’s the small issue of the apocalypse. London as we know it has suffered an Armageddon . . . but hey! Life still goes on right?

If you’re entering the Metrozone for the first time, we’ve put together a handy guide to its genesis, and what sort of things you might expect to find there . . . (more…)

Petrovitch is back! Presenting THE CURVE OF THE EARTH

The Curve of the Earth, a science fiction adventure novel set in the Philip K. Dick award-winning world of the Samuil Petrovitch novels - perfect for fans of Richard Morgan Coming up in March is something we’ve all been waiting for: a new novel in the mind-blowing Philip K. Dick Award-winning Samuil Petrovitch series by Simon Morden.
THE CURVE OF THE EARTH (UK | US | ANZ) is a pure hit of adrenaline-filled science fiction goodness. It features everyone’s favourite foul-mouthed, bad-tempered, cybernetically-enhanced, AI-implanted, sociopathic, mad Russian genius Samuil Petrovitch.

This novel is a great place for anyone new to the Petrovitch novels to start. If you’re a fan of the likes of Richard Morgan and his classic novel Altered Carbon (another Philip K. Dick Award winner) then this is certainly for you.

THE CURVE OF THE EARTH is set 10 years after the previous three Petrovitch books ended (EQUATIONS OF LIFE, THEORIES OF FLIGHT and DEGREES OF FREEDOM) and features more high-octane action in the gritty world of the Metrozone – a dangerous post-apocalyptic London full of crooked cops, mad cults and gun-toting nuns.

This story will again see Petrovitch come head-to-head with those people he just loves to hate: Reconstructionist America. But this time he’s on a trip to the frozen slopes of North Alaska to find out what’s happened to his adopted daughter Lucy…

See the blurb below and Prepare to be Petrovitched. (more…)

August Events

Sunday, August 5
T.C. McCarthy and Michael J. Sullivan at Flyleaf Books, Chapel Hill, NC, 2 PM

August 8 – 12
Nicole Peeler, Kristen Painter, Jaye Wells, and Amanda Carlson at Authors After Dark, New Orleans, LA

August 17
The Orbit team will be attending Blackwells’ High Fantasy Night, and, because he’s in London on a rare visit from Australia, Ian Irvine will be signing books at the event!

August 24 – 27
Simon Morden at the Greenbelt Festival, Gloucestershire, UK

August 31 – September 2
A number of Orbit authors will be attending either Chicon and DragonCon over Labor Day weekend!

Three Orbit books nominated for 2012 Philip K. Dick Award

The nominees for the 2012 Philip K. Dick Award, for science fiction paperback originals, were announced today, including three books from Orbit: The Company Man (US | UK | ANZ) by Robert Jackson Bennett, Deadline (US | UK | ANZ) by Mira Grant, and the Samuil Petrovitch trilogy by Simon Morden (comprising Equations of Life [US | UK | ANZ], Theories of Flight [US | UK | ANZ], and Degrees of Freedom [US | UK | ANZ]).

The Company Man Deadline

Equations of Life  Theories of Flight Degrees of Freedom

The award will be presented by the Philadelphia Science Fiction Society and the Philip K. Dick Trust to the winner at Norwescon in Seattle on Friday, April 6, 2012. The full list of nominees appears below.

  • A Soldier’s Duty by Jean Johnson (Ace Books)
  • After the Apocalypse by Maureen F. McHugh (Small Beer Press)
  • Deadline by Mira Grant (Orbit)
  • The Company Man by Robert Jackson Bennett (Orbit)
  • The Other by Matthew Hughes (Underland Press)
  • The Postmortal by Drew Magary (Penguin Books)
  • The Samuil Petrovitch Trilogy by Simon Morden (Orbit)

New (Eyebending) Wallpaper for Simon Morden’s Trilogy

I know it’s been a little while since we’ve done a fun wallpaper in the house (It was a great wallpaper too – Leviathan Wakes, if you didn’t download it you totally should!). So, I have written before about how much I love how the covers for the Simon Morden books came out, and have taken the opportunity to do a poster, a video, and now…wallpapers! Just in time for the third book to hit shelves. So make sure you go pick up Equations of Life, Theories of Flight, and Degrees of Freedom

Available for screens of all sizes, now you can carry a mind-warping piece of the Metrozone with you everywhere! I even finally figured out how to make the ipad version work with the vertical/horizontal twist. As usual, if I missed a specific screen size you’d like, leave a comment and I’ll format it for you!

1024 x 768 | 1280 x 800 | 1440 x 900 | 1680 x 1050 | 1920 x 1200iPhone | iPadNetbook (1024×600)

THEORIES OF FLIGHT: Prepare . . .

Theories of Flight, Book 2 in Simon Morden’s explosive Metrozone series is now at large worldwide.

Prepare for more explosions. Prepare for more smart-ass foul-mouthing from Petrovitch. And prepare for more from the New Machine Jihad.

And just in case you’ve been wondering what people have been saying about the series . . .

‘A fast-paced thriller . . . an absorbing read’ TELEGRAPH

‘Speeds along with energetic panache’ THE TIMES

‘Morden keeps up a breathless breakneck pace that doesn’t sacrifice character depth or intelligence . . . promises to be a fast-paced thrill ride for the cynical urban space cowboy in all of us’ i09

‘Petrovitch is one of those characters you can’t help but warm to, and readers will be eager to experience more of his adventures and his relentless Russian swearing’ FINANCIAL TIMES

‘The action is relentless and Morden has a natural talent for a plot that keeps the reader guessing’ GUARDIAN

‘A fantastic piece of work – a roller-coaster ride through a post-plague hit London that made me think of Richard Morgan’s Altered Carbon colliding head on with Gibson’s Neuromancer, whilst side-swiping Stephenson’s Snowcrash. I absolutely loved it!’ SFREVU

‘A heart-stopping onslaught of science and action for much of its perfectly judged duration, paced like a runaway train, and Morden handles the fireworks with a steady hand . . . truly exhilarating stuff’ THE SPECULATIVE SCOTSMAN

(more…)

How-To Video: Equations of Life Poster

So I have written before about how I love the Simon Morden trilogy that has started hitting shelves. Samuil Petrovitch is my favorite kind of snarling sarcastic anti-hero, and a genius rocket scientist to boot. My kind of guy. And I especially love Orbit for letting me be a bit daring with the cover design and rock these really graphic optical illusion covers.

So what you don’t know is that the initial design was even crazier. I wanted to hide the cover text IN the optical illusions. Slight legibility problem, I admit, for a teeny book cover…but FABULOUS for a poster. And since I know you guys love these how-to videos, I screen-captured my process so you too can make your own Editable-Text Optical Illusion Poster…and melt the retinas of all your friends. After the jump you can even download the Illustrator file I used, and add your own text. (more…)